Your Modern World Strikes Again

A school in India has named the monkey god Hanuman chairman of the college.

“The position comes with an incense-filled office, a desk and a laptop computer. Four chairs will be placed facing the empty seat reserved for the chairman and all visitors must enter the office barefoot, said Vivek Kangdi, the school’s vice chairman.”

The real kicker? It’s a technology school! They hand out bachelor’s degrees in engineering and management, and it only opened last year. I’m guessing either Hanuman’s tenure will be short-lived or the college will go bust.

Of course, it’s a good way to dodge solicitors.

“Hi, I’m Vijay, and I’m here to sell these wonderful new textbooks to your school.”

“Ah, welcome Vijay. Let me show you to Lord Hanuman’s office.”

Then they just leave the guy to sit there and twiddle his thumbs for a couple hours.

It makes me wonder if there are any US companies who might have nominated Jesus to a similar post. Then the shareholders would be pissed, the board of directors would vote Him out, and the headlines would probably read something like this:

GENERIC AMERICAN WIDGETS FIRES JESUS CHRIST
Board sites lack of shareholder faith

There may be a bright side for Generic American Widgets, though. If they did hire the big JC as CEO, he’s probably not prone to throwing his feces.

About Mike Oliveri

Mike Oliveri is a writer, martial artist, cigar aficionado, motorcyclist, and family man, but not necessarily in that order. He is currently hard at work on the werewolf noir series The Pack for Evileye Books.

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