This page will be very organic, growing and changing as needed. Anything not covered? Email me.
Q: How can I get my books signed?
A: The easiest way is to show up at one of my appearances (and hopefully I’ll be back on the con circuit soon). I’ll be happy to sign whatever you have, but please do check the venue’s rules first. For example, if a bookstore requires you to purchase a book if you want something signed, I will always defer to my host’s rules.
And honestly, you should pick up something else while you’re there. Bookstores and comic shops go through a lot of effort to bring in creators. If you’re not sure what to get, hell, ask us for a recommendation.
Q: Can I mail you books for signatures?
A: I’d prefer you didn’t, if only because this often results in lost and damaged books and I cannot and will not assume responsibility if a more valuable earlier work of mine such as 4×4 is mangled by the post office.
Q: Can I mail you [books|cigars|cookies|manuscripts]?
A: Gifts are always cool. However, unsolicited/unexpected manuscripts, stories, etc., will be discarded unread. I’ll be happy to take published works, but be warned, my reading habits are both picky and slow, and I may not get around to it in a timely manner if you’re hoping for feedback. Food, unfortunately, will be discarded uneaten as well. Cigars are cool, exploding cigars not so much. Risking felony charges from the post office for a gag exploding cigar is probably not worth it.
Q: Someone sent Brian Keene a dead bird. Can I send you one, too?
A: Please don’t.
Q: Okay, cool. I’m not a douche and I want to send you something cool, or I’m Old School and prefer to correspond by snail mail. What address should I use?
A: Mike Oliveri, PO Box 282, Eureka, IL 61530.