Tag Archive for squid

Machinery of Death

Scientists have released more photos of the colossal squid I mentioned last week, and it’s not good. Hook-lined tentacles, sharp beak, ovaries capable of holding thousands of eggs… this thing was made to kill, eat, and breed, period. I’d sooner swim with a shark.

The ocean will kill us all.

About Mike Oliveri

Mike Oliveri is a writer, martial artist, cigar aficionado, motorcyclist, and family man, but not necessarily in that order. He is currently hard at work on the werewolf noir series The Pack for Evileye Books.

It Will Swallow Your Head

Nay, your very soul!

CNN has a video of a giant squid that, fortunately for the dude in the tank with it, is dead.

At least I hope it is, for his sake. “Not dead which eternal lie” and all that.

About Mike Oliveri

Mike Oliveri is a writer, martial artist, cigar aficionado, motorcyclist, and family man, but not necessarily in that order. He is currently hard at work on the werewolf noir series The Pack for Evileye Books.

Reminder: The Ocean STILL Hates You

Meet Promachoteuthis sulcus, what would be the most terrifying creature on the planet if it weren’t only 25mm wide or long or whatever ML means. And tiny or not, I wouldn’t want great swarms of them to surround me and nibble me to death.

If you click the picture, it says the teeth are actually folded lips which conceal its beaks. I don’t find that much more comforting. I’m convinced it pulls in the beak and builds these rudimentary teeth to speak.

“Hello. I am the Great Cock of Cthulhu. I am going to swallow your soul.”

(C’mon, look at the shape of it. You didn’t think it would squeeze by without a phallic joke, did you?)

About Mike Oliveri

Mike Oliveri is a writer, martial artist, cigar aficionado, motorcyclist, and family man, but not necessarily in that order. He is currently hard at work on the werewolf noir series The Pack for Evileye Books.