Twitter Shenanigans for 2012-01-24

  • My phone battery quit at 3pm, so I didn't get to tell much about the rest of the #sundance experience today. #
  • We did see @BrianKeene's GHOUL, though. True to the spirit of the book! The rest of you will get to see it Friday, April 13th, on Chiller. #
  • Slamdance! http://t.co/ntLoOhIp #
  • Rockin' #Slamdance at #Sundance earlier today. http://t.co/gFfB8JFO #
  • Occupy Provo at #Sundance http://t.co/6KP2RVzy #
  • Now @Nukegumby is telling us all about the bored-on. #
  • What a horseshit rationalization: Piracy Is Not Theft – Demotivational Poster http://t.co/lyUcU3Qr #
  • Stumbling through the condo zombie style. It's been a great weekend at #Sundance and #Slamdance but I'm ready to get back to the family. #
  • I need to go home and write my balls off. That way, next time I get to do Sundance, I don't have to worry about going back to the day job. #
  • Then again, I'd probably miss my balls. #
  • Today's @BrianKeene and @Nukegumby serenade features The Moody Blues. #
  • I am going to miss this view. http://t.co/97KXOgHC #
  • Mountains trump the Illinois pancake http://t.co/8DixKGCh #
  • Colorful characters at gate, including an ex-Marine, 2 Mormon missionaries, and an Air Force officer with a lot of fruit salad on his chest. #
  • The missionaries are apparently headed to Mozambique. Yeah, good luck with that. #
  • Awesome. I'm sitting next to a guy twice my size for this three-hour flight. #
  • Stewardess is frustrated because they're out of room for carry-ons. Maybe if they didn't charge bag fees, this wouldn't happen. Idiots. #
  • If I wrote full-time, I could have made this a road trip and avoid this hassle. Take extra driving time, see sights, visit friends. #
  • Greetings from 10,000 feet up in the magic sky tube. I'm online because I have business to conduct. #
  • Having to type on the split-screen keyboard because our shoulders are way too broad to do it right. #
  • Between flights, I have been assaulted with problems from the day job. Welcome home, asshole. #
  • Wow, wish I'd known about THE RAID while I was at #Sundance this weekend: http://t.co/3xwGEIno Looks awesome. #
  • Orbitz texted me about a gate change. One would think the goddamn airline would say something, no? #
  • 64 degrees in Dallas. I could ride my motorcycle in that, easy. Maybe I will stay put and have my family come to me. #
  • While reading on the flight, I've been really digging @DocNoir's ALL THE YOUNG WARRIORS. Great read. #
  • Three old people at gate comparing weather in Nebraska and Peoria. One-upping each other. Couldn't flee that conversation fast enough. #
  • Solo window seat for flight home. Sweet relief. Shoulder still juts into aisle, but a solid elbow keeps pinheads in check. #
  • Now the steward has to deal with dumbasses looking at seat numbers on the wrong tickets, and who are then scared they're on the wrong plane. #
  • THIS IS NOT ROCKET SCIENCE, PEOPLE! READ YOUR TICKET, SIT THE FUCK DOWN, SHUT THE FUCK UP! #
  • Still, these people beat the PR and marketing douches we ran into at #Sundance #

About Mike Oliveri

Mike Oliveri is a writer, martial artist, cigar aficionado, motorcyclist, and family man, but not necessarily in that order. His Bram Stoker Award-winning first novel, Deadliest of the Species, was just reprinted by Evileye Books.

Twitter Shenanigans for 2012-01-23

  • Roadblock! They just want to make sure our awesome truck is awesome. http://t.co/98bkzX4V #
  • Past the road block. Cruising along now. Libations pending. #
  • Pass. http://t.co/yCvb358T #
  • Libations! http://t.co/pSfZBYYc #
  • We may not be doing #Sundance due to the weather, but it's very cool just chilling with friends at the lodge. Sushi, whisky… good times. #
  • I think my doctor would just shoot me if he saw all this stuff. #
  • Today's view, following the blizzard http://t.co/BdtmOIFn #
  • Looking back at last night's pics, I'm thinking something seems wrong about #Sundance being sponsored by HP. Or anyone else, really. #
  • I wonder if we'll have to listen to a douchebag publicist and a WB marketing jerkoff give each other handies on the shuttle again today. #
  • Help a brother out: RT @cullenbunn: I have my e-mail inbox cleared down to 5 messages. I need some hate mail, people! #
  • Dominic Purcell just walked by. No, I didn't accost him. #Sundance #
  • The Egyptian #sundance Sponsored by Southwest http://t.co/q77OC4H5 #
  • I should know better than to buy Italian sausage in Utah. #
  • The Sundance Channel HQ is serving the worst hot chocolate I've ever tasted. #
  • Cell service has gone to crap. Trying to send a PC from outside #Slamdance HQ. 2 hours until @BrianKeene's Ghoul premiere. #
  • Just smoked a cigar with two gorgeous girls, watched Occupy Provo protest, and got accosted by Cactus Jack's drunk girlfriend. #sundance #
  • At #Sundance fashion trumps snow, ice, and slush. #

About Mike Oliveri

Mike Oliveri is a writer, martial artist, cigar aficionado, motorcyclist, and family man, but not necessarily in that order. His Bram Stoker Award-winning first novel, Deadliest of the Species, was just reprinted by Evileye Books.

Twitter Shenanigans for 2012-01-22

  • His first twat, at long last: RT @Nukegumby: Testing…tweeting on nuclear power! #
  • Success! SOPA is dead http://t.co/cgUdVQyM #
  • Chill time. http://t.co/uoldViOR #
  • View from our Olympic Village condo. #sundance http://t.co/pEeeNnrK #
  • Listening to @BrianKeene discuss his plans to conquer Hollywood. #
  • We have thundersnow up in the mountains. #
  • Touché, asshole. RT @BrianKeene: Listening to @MikeOliveri discuss his plans to conquer breakfast. #
  • I'm told the thunder is actually cannons that knock down avalanches on the ski slopes. Probably not as cool as it sounds. #
  • Now @BrianKeene and @Nukegumby are assailing @marysangiovanni and I with their a capella rendition of Rush's 2112. #
  • The tub drain is clogged. Swell. I think @marysangiovanni's tub is messed up, too. @BrianKeene is attempting to help her. #
  • Now @BrianKeene is attempting to help her. From the sound of things, it's a very stubborn clog. #
  • The snow is accumulating. I hope @TodClark's thin Texas blood is not turning to ice. If necessary, we shall thaw him with Maker's Mark. #
  • (Because that's what he brought. I wonder how hard it is to find Jameson in LDS land?) #
  • I don't know what this is, but it's weird. Looks like balls. http://t.co/8fbA6crW #
  • On a shuttle down to Sundance, listening to the most vapid, Valley Girl conversation I've ever heard. #
  • Main Street in Park City is jam packed. Not a whole lot to see with all the snow. #
  • A movie — oh, sorry, a FILM — must have just ended. People are suddenly streaming into the sushi bar & grill we're chilling at. #
  • While @BrianKeene fulfills a Hollywood obligation, we are stuffing our faces with sushi and Kobe beef. #
  • Mr @BrianKeene has returned a conquering hero. #
  • If this asshole says "literally" one more time, I will literally punch him in the face. #
  • It's funny listening to all these LA types bitch and moan about the snow. #sundance #
  • Subtitle: A Manual for Douchebags http://t.co/TjA3ecme #
  • Roads are closed to anything but 4WD vehicles, but @Nukegumby has us covered. We're on the way to rescue @MarkSylva. #
  • Rolling along behind snow plows and spreaders. It will take longer, but we'll be safe. #
  • The plows have forsaken us. We forge ahead. #
  • We have retrieved @MarkSylva from a SLC Burger King. Now back up the mountain pass. I need a badass truck like @Nukegumby's. #

About Mike Oliveri

Mike Oliveri is a writer, martial artist, cigar aficionado, motorcyclist, and family man, but not necessarily in that order. His Bram Stoker Award-winning first novel, Deadliest of the Species, was just reprinted by Evileye Books.

Twitter Shenanigans for 2012-01-21

  • Going to feel naked at Sundance/Slamdance without my knife and Zippo, but I’m not checking baggage or chancing TSA confiscation. #
  • Yep. Doing laundry at 1AM because you have nothing for the trip ROCKS. #
  • At the airport with a half hour to spare, and will still get right through security with time to spare. Love these tiny regional airports. #
  • One of the TSA agents this morning is also one of the better cashiers at our Barnes & Noble. Good start to the trip! #
  • And I had a pleasant conversation with the grandmother sitting next to me on the flight. Bonus! I usually get crabby commuters. #
  • Wow. Verizon sucks balls in Dallas. #
  • A plain white t-shirt and a pink scarf? Really, hipster douchebag? #
  • “Hipsters to the left of me, douchebags to the right and here I am, stuck in the middle with you.” #
  • Now if only the TSA would let me pack a straight razor. #
  • Hey, Karen Allen is in my flight. Marion rules. #
  • Pro: This flight has wifi. Con: I’m in a row with no tray table because I’m behind the galley. Going to be difficult to write with no tray. #
  • Right next to the engine, too! Bonus deafness for the win! This flight is looking to be the polar opposite of the last. #
  • “Your honor, I’m just a caveman. Your flying metal tube frightens and confuses me. But I have Twitter in it!” #
  • Sat on the runway for about thirty minutes, but I have a tray table after all. Friendly sky lady pulled it out of my seat like Houdini. #
  • While I’m at Sundance, you should read a free novel from @Docnoir: PSYCHOSOMATIC FREE ON SATURDAY & SUNDAY http://t.co/tmdNr0jE #
  • 30 minutes of free wifi is up on my iPad, but not my iPod touch! Suck it, Gogo! Now to see what’s up with @BrianKeene‘s flight… #
  • The Cascades, as seen from Seat 31A http://t.co/Lqx1K2do #
  • It’s weird seeing mountains. Used to flat ol’ Illinois. #
  • Mikey just drove us past the Mormon Magic Kingdom. Next time I will have to have my camera ready. #
  • Circled behind it, got a picture after all. http://t.co/6aFOMn5w #
  • Gurkha Assassin Dagger. @TodClark and I waste no time. http://t.co/L7gxjpta #
  • Finally have the whole crew together. Now to dump our luggage in Park City and find some chow. #
  • We got a sweet condo for this thing. Movie people know how to roll. #

About Mike Oliveri

Mike Oliveri is a writer, martial artist, cigar aficionado, motorcyclist, and family man, but not necessarily in that order. His Bram Stoker Award-winning first novel, Deadliest of the Species, was just reprinted by Evileye Books.

Twitter Shenanigans for 2012-01-21

  • Going to feel naked at Sundance/Slamdance without my knife and Zippo, but I'm not checking baggage or chancing TSA confiscation. #
  • Yep. Doing laundry at 1AM because you have nothing for the trip ROCKS. #
  • At the airport with a half hour to spare, and will still get right through security with time to spare. Love these tiny regional airports. #
  • One of the TSA agents this morning is also one of the better cashiers at our Barnes & Noble. Good start to the trip! #
  • And I had a pleasant conversation with the grandmother sitting next to me on the flight. Bonus! I usually get crabby commuters. #
  • Wow. Verizon sucks balls in Dallas. #
  • A plain white t-shirt and a pink scarf? Really, hipster douchebag? #
  • "Hipsters to the left of me, douchebags to the right and here I am, stuck in the middle with you." #
  • Now if only the TSA would let me pack a straight razor. #
  • Hey, Karen Allen is in my flight. Marion rules. #
  • Pro: This flight has wifi. Con: I'm in a row with no tray table because I'm behind the galley. Going to be difficult to write with no tray. #
  • Right next to the engine, too! Bonus deafness for the win! This flight is looking to be the polar opposite of the last. #
  • "Your honor, I'm just a caveman. Your flying metal tube frightens and confuses me. But I have Twitter in it!" #
  • Sat on the runway for about thirty minutes, but I have a tray table after all. Friendly sky lady pulled it out of my seat like Houdini. #
  • While I'm at Sundance, you should read a free novel from @Docnoir: PSYCHOSOMATIC FREE ON SATURDAY & SUNDAY http://t.co/tmdNr0jE #
  • 30 minutes of free wifi is up on my iPad, but not my iPod touch! Suck it, Gogo! Now to see what's up with @BrianKeene's flight… #
  • The Cascades, as seen from Seat 31A http://t.co/Lqx1K2do #
  • It's weird seeing mountains. Used to flat ol' Illinois. #
  • Mikey just drove us past the Mormon Magic Kingdom. Next time I will have to have my camera ready. #
  • Circled behind it, got a picture after all. http://t.co/6aFOMn5w #
  • Gurkha Assassin Dagger. @TodClark and I waste no time. http://t.co/L7gxjpta #
  • Finally have the whole crew together. Now to dump our luggage in Park City and find some chow. #
  • We got a sweet condo for this thing. Movie people know how to roll. #

About Mike Oliveri

Mike Oliveri is a writer, martial artist, cigar aficionado, motorcyclist, and family man, but not necessarily in that order. His Bram Stoker Award-winning first novel, Deadliest of the Species, was just reprinted by Evileye Books.

Photo Friday: Smoke

So far behind on everything.

I’ve got a few weeks’ worth of photos, some for Photo Friday, some family stuff, and a few more that I can’t even get off the camera yet because it’s out of juice and my charger has disappeared.

The following is a portrait of my cousin:

Smoke

Ahh, smoke.

He’s a distant cousin by marriage, actually, and he found me online thanks to my Smoke Blog posts. We’ve talked a lot since, but this is the first time we were able to meet face to face. We had steaks & beers at a local microbrew, then relaxed and chatted with a couple of cigars. It was right after things started ramping up at work, what with the start of the school year, so couldn’t have come at a better time.

I’m happy with how the camera handled this. We were sitting in near-total darkness, but the camera and my Canon 430EX SpeedLite metered it out just fine. I bounced the flash off the white roof of the porch to smooth out the light, and I just dig the result.

And he did, of course, give me a hard time for not finishing Lie with the Dead yet. It’s good that even family is keeping me honest on that one. Lately it’s been more a matter of time than of desire or other issues, but the school year has settled in and things are moving into a rhythm. I’ll get there.

I’ve apparently been too quiet on Twitter, too, as one person asked if I was dead. All symptoms of the same thing: overloaded with work and commitments. This month needs to be a big one for me, though, as once LwtD is done I have a short story that needs revising and a new one due in November. Busy busy busy.

Here’s hoping Autumn is as quiet as I’ve been anticipating.

About Mike Oliveri

Mike Oliveri is a writer, martial artist, cigar aficionado, motorcyclist, and family man, but not necessarily in that order. His Bram Stoker Award-winning first novel, Deadliest of the Species, was just reprinted by Evileye Books.

Flattery Will Get You Everywhere

Saw this on Twitter today, felt pretty damn good about it.

Twitter
Yeah. I’m awesome.

You can get said great fiction in trade paperback or for the Kindle or Nook.

Thanks to Paperback Horror for the great mini-review. You can read their full review here.

About Mike Oliveri

Mike Oliveri is a writer, martial artist, cigar aficionado, motorcyclist, and family man, but not necessarily in that order. His Bram Stoker Award-winning first novel, Deadliest of the Species, was just reprinted by Evileye Books.